How to survive living with a depressed husband
Have you got a depressed husband or partner? It’s not easy, is it? The constant low mood, the negative response to everything you say (or do), the lack of communication, the rejection of socializing or having fun, the loss of interest in sexual intimacy (or even just having a cuddle!), the black pessimism about every single thing – it’s enough to drive you into a depression of your own!
Depression is a common experience
Living with a depressed husband can be one of the trickiest challenges a wife can face in the course of a marriage. And depression is a common affliction – about one in four people will experience one or more episodes of depression in the course of a lifetime. When you care deeply for someone, it is very hard to see them go through the experience of depression – and even harder to know how to go about helping them.
Depression is not necessarily the end of a relationship
A wife is not a therapist, and your role in your husband’s recovery, while possibly vitally important, is nonetheless quite different from that of a doctor or therapist. While your husband is dealing with depression, he is quite literally unable to ‘think straight’ and may find the emotional strain so great that he just ‘shuts down’. This does not mean he no longer cares for you or about you – just that he is unable to handle any more emotion.
What a wife needs to remember about her husband’s depression
Facing this kind of reaction from a depressed husband has led many a wife (and their husbands) to conclude that the relationship is over, and indeed many marriages founder during a period of depression. But this is not at all inevitable if the wife can keep a number of essentials in mind. In particular, it is vital to remember:
- depression is usually a temporary phenomenon and even without treatment will normally lift within a year
- the assurance of your steady love, in spite of everything, can give your husband courage and motivation to come through depression, even if he cannot express his appreciation or even denies it
- staying well and strong in yourself allows you to be a beacon of hope for your husband and a sign that life without depression is possible
- you are not responsible for your husband’s depression, nor for his recovery
How you can help yourself cope with your husband’s depression
There are a number of things you can do to ensure you do stay as well as possible and don’t get sucked into depression yourself. The most important is to look after yourself. This means eating properly, getting enough exercise and rest, and doing things that you enjoy and that bring you satisfaction and pleasure. In fact, making sure that you are okay could be the most helpful thing you can do for your depressed husband.
And there’s a very good way to make the whole process easier for yourself.
Living with a depressed husband is an audio hypnosis session designed specifically for the wives and partners of depressed men. Based on the most up to date understandings of a) how depression works and b) how men and women differ in their responses, this session uses the power of hypnosis to help you build and maintain your personal resilience in the face of these difficult times.
You will learn how to enter into a state of profound relaxation – in itself a highly welcome relief from the pressures and strains of the situation. And you will discover how to inspire hope in yourself (and your husband) that together you can make it through.
Download Living with a depressed husband and help him by helping yourself.